Sing, sing a song

Hellllllllllllllllllllloooooooooooooooooooooooo, LSB readers! It's me, Dakota Cassidy and I'm back to thrill, titillate, tempt, oh, okay, TAUNT you.

LOLI'm kidding. I would NEVER taunt you.

Today's blog is easy cheesy Japaneesie--all ya gotta do is tell me what your favorite song to boink to is. That's IT. No big deal and if you don't have one, you can make one up. I won't know and if I don't know, I can't call you a fibber. LOLLOL.

Anyway, here's my point--Everybody always says Sexual Healing, by Marvin Gay or Barry White's, It's Ecstasy When You Lay Down Next to Me are all time boinking favorites. However, I thought I might talk about the songs you DON'T want playing in the background when you're making whoopie or the songs that make you cringe when you hear them because you had too much to drin--er, a minor indiscretion and the song will forever be a painful reminder of your "Oh, no, I did not!?"

For example--Meatloaf's Paradise By The Dashboard Light--K, I dunno 'bout you, but boinking in the car brings to mind sticky leather seats and the cheap, residual smell of your dates idea of dinner out--A Happy Meal you had to split cuz he was low on cash, ya feel me? There is no Paradise by the dashboard to be found if it's in a parking lot at the Motel Six. However, look on the bright side. If you had Two out of Three--it ain't bad. LOL

Another Meatloaf winner is, I Would Do Anything, But I won't Do That. Um, if he won't do that--then, you don't "do that", got that? LOLLOL

AC DC's What Do Ya Do For Money, Honey? The proper non-alcoholic response? Not you, honey :)

And more AC DC, Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap--You'd better have gotten more than a meal that followed the question "Would you like that supersized?" outta this, young lady or we have to talk.

Help by the Beatles--If he's asks for help--you need to Let it Be :)

Like a Virgin, by Madonna. Er, look, if you hooked up with a virgin, what were ya thinkin'? This ain't day care, already...so you need to split and go to the big-girl playground or you're officially Borderline psych ward material. Cuz he is too young to be Crazy For You. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Love Stinks, by the J. Geils Band is a prime example of an unwise choice in attitude for a bedmate, yes? You might end up a Centerfold all over the Internet, if you're not careful.

Like a Prayer (Oh, that Madonna)--sigh--if he's prayin', you shouldn't be layin'. LMAO

If you're hoping for an orgasm and he tells you to Dream On, like Areosmith sings, uh, I think you made a mistake. LOLLOL. There is no Sweet Emotion to be had there and do remind him, Jaynie's Got a Gun...she can hurt him and he won't ever Walk This Way again :)

Here's one to really avoid, like the plague--Julio Iglesias' To All the Girls I've Loved Before--or you may leave with the plague. Plus, he sings that with a guy who has pigtails, for crap's sake...LOLLOL (sorry Willie).

Phillip Bailey and Phil Collins sang Easy Lover --if you were rippin' yer panties off before he even bought ya dinner--this applies to you. Have you learned nothing? This isn't some Groovy Kind Of Love, silly. If I were you, I'd say, "Take Me Home."

How about some country music--one of my favs :)

Kenney Chesney's She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy--Look, what the H-E double hockey sticks are you doing on a tractor? Naked, no less? This implies yer out in a field somewhere, behaving badly in a public row of corn in like Idaho, not to mention, you could easily get tics and hay fever or something. That ain't sexy LOL

How about Two Pina Colada's? By Garth Brooks. You know, the two you drank before you lost count of them and ended up spending the night with some greasy loser because in your drunken haze, his hair reminded you of Brad Pitts? LOLLOL

Here's another big Garth Brooks no-no--Ain't Goin' Down Before the Sun Comes Up--k, if I have to explain this to you--I can't help you on ANY level. LOLLOL. All I know is this, if I can't hear Thunder Rolls, I cannot be Friends in Low Places (dayum, count that--three--yes, THREE songs in a row. LOLLOL. wait, it gets better).

If you're Prayin' For Daylight (Rascal Flatts), well, then--again, I say, see self explanatory, cuz I'm Movin' On.

What if he calls you, Delilah (big, dreamy sigh...Tom Jones) and you're name is Tallulah? Well, they DO rhyme, yes? You need to ditch this zero and hit the Green, Green Grass of Home :)

Now, on the other hand, if he calls you My Kind of Lover, and offers to do The Stroke, with Two Tickets to Paradise as a reward--You're Leavin' on a Jetplane to Kokomo, baby. Cuz Love Is In The Air. I'll put you on the plane myself. (Billy Squire, Eddie Money the Beach Boys, John Paul Young and Peter, Paul and Mary whew!) Congrats, you've found you're One In A Million, and if you get lucky, you could be Goin' To The Chapel! (Larry Graham and the Dixie Cups)

Now, all you have to do is this--post your favorite mattress stomping song here in the comments section and you're in. I'll throw your name in a hat and you're eligible for a random drawing for some Chocolate from Godiva to be announced tonight at 9:00 EST :)

That's IT. So c'mon out and say hello to me. Don't be shy--I want to hear what ya like to listen to when you say to your honey, "Let's make nookie, cookie!"

Until next time--hugs and many thanks for all of your support,

Dakota :)