Sunday, February 26, 2006

Rescue Me... No, Really... Please!

So, here I sit wondering what the heck to write... I don't often get around to visiting the blog as I am a fulltime college teacher and in the throes of working on my PhD. Add to the equation home remodeling, commuting 200 miles a day for work and school, and all the other general day-to-day life-stuff that goes on, and I barely have time to check in with myself! So, Rescue Me was my first attempt at writing anything outside of the academic arena, and it was just a blast to write it (much more fun that writing for research). And, this is my first attempt at blogging, so here goes:

The significant other/boyfriend is asleep in the bed after just having flown in from Japan (he's a geeky engineer and does a lot of traveling). And, he (unbeknownst to him) was the question of the week with my students.

When I talk about myself in context to the subjects I'm teaching (I'm a sociology instructor so we often talk about sex, relationships and life in general), I never really know how to approach WHAT he is. Is he the boyfriend, the significant other, the partner, the companion? After a certain age, boyfriend seems rather inappropriate, but my students tell me partner isn't right either (as they assume this means I have a female partner). Significant other is so freakin' PC, and companion sound like he's my dog! So, even thought it has nothing to do with Rescue Me, what do I call the guy in the bed?

Any suggestions? And, any comments or questions about the book?


Blogger snowflake said...

I think boyfriend or SO are fine but here are some suggestions I can think of -- Sweetheart, my other half, the current man in my life, the man who completes me. Guess you can tell I'm not very good at this. LOL

9:54 AM  
Blogger Tina Holland said...

Other half, I like that one. I always call mine S.O. (Significant Other) even though we are married. I still think he's significant. My friends tease me that I can easily change that to S.O.B. should the need arise. LOL!

10:16 AM  
Blogger Sherrill Quinn said...

Friend with benefits? LOL

Congratulations on the book, Jane!

10:50 AM  
Blogger Jane Marshall said...

Thanks for the suggestions! My girlfriends have their own little ideas... "beachboy" (he lives in a condo on the ocean), "the geek" (from Beauty and the Geek, although I think he's definitely a geek-post-makeover), and "the guy you met online after months of searching"... all in good fun.

In private, it is "Sweets," which came from the expression "Sweets for the sweet" if he's good; and if he's misbehaving, it's "the one whose eye I want to poke out with a pencil."

Thanks to you all for responding. Here's another question that some of you might be able to shed some light on. I'm doing some research for an academic paper on romance novels. Question: has there ever been a "series type" of romance novels for men (like Silhouette, Harlequin, etc). The research I'd like to do entails the differences between romance book covers for women and men (if there are any for men).

Thanks much!

11:18 AM  
Blogger Jeanette J said...

you could call him by his name...just about my guy (sounds like a song)or he who must be obeyed (oops wrong pronoun..should be she)or my bed heater....I don't seem to be helping here so you're on your own. Good Luck

11:21 AM  
Blogger A J Matthews said...

Congratulations on the book, and well done for finding the time to write!

I always liked "my squeeze" when talking about partner/wife/hubby. Sounds kinda cuddly ;)

Romance for men? Well, we do read them, but to the best of my knowledge there's not been a series such as you mention.

12:35 PM  
Blogger Jennifer Y. said...

I like "boyfriend".

The book sounds great!

12:49 PM  
Blogger Jane Marshall said...

Jeanette, I like "bed heater!" How about "back rubber?"

AJ, I guess then my next question is: how do I go about identifying romance novels that are written for men? Is there a way to compile a list? I'd need to have at least a couple dozen to do any sort of research comparison...

1:33 PM  
Anonymous annalisa said...

I've always liked "Soul Mate".

Your book sounds really really good! :)

3:12 PM  
Blogger A J Matthews said...

Hmm, good question, Jane. To my knowledge I can't think of any romance novels that are written specifically for men, although I have a hazy recollection of a NYC publishing house coming up with a range some years back.

I can only speak for myself. I've read works by Denise Dietz, Deena Glass, Sheri Gilmore and Michele Chambers. I have a soft spot for Jane Austin's Pride & Prejudice. Truly a classic!

5:26 PM  
Blogger Emma Sinclair said...

I actually like the one you came up with: "the guy in my bed."

I knew a woman once who called her guy "the man I share my life with," but that just seems long winded to me.

7:55 PM  
Blogger Jane Marshall said...

Well, I thought, why don't I ask the guy in the bed what he wants to be called...

I got the standard "boyfriend" answer, although he did say he felt a bit old for that (we are barely in our 40s!). Then with a lick of his lips, he suggested "the tool..." and a few others equally as lewd. I had to laugh, not at his penis-driven confession, but at the picture in my head of dinner with my mother (or his)...

ME: "Tool, could you pass the butter?..."

MOM: "I"m sorry dear, what did you call him?"

8:22 PM  
Blogger blackroze37 -tami said...

i never been married, and i have that problem, the guy i live with (now purely sep rooms) has been 15 yrs, alot refer to us (especailly HIS family ) husband and wife, so i took to calling him my worst half ,
azzhole, (yes to his face)
jimmy just cant get that out,,and floppy (yes his real life nick name is something stupid)
he also happens to be 16 yrs older than me. we have 2 children together , 13, 9 ,,,,,,,, i also have a 18 yr old , and he has a 27 yr old {all girls}im also a granny of a 1 yr old, he seems to think he is the granpa)
( i think my name says my age, im 37,, so being with tash,chey hollering DADDY at him, i took to calling him that in stores and what not, only probelm is i look older
but i really dont know what to call him
1 if his sister call him, jim
the other calls himn floppy
and his brother call him both

and filling out forms, there aint no HIM type thing, unless its OTHER im stil makring single

9:08 PM  
Blogger snowflake said...

Oh Jane, call him Tool! I'm sure your mom and his mom can see the humor...or not!

1:55 AM  

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